Crying Together

In London, I worked as a volunteer for an organization called "Women for Women International". WFW helps women recover and become economically independent after war in their country. One day, I hosted a tea with a group of my friends to hear about the group's operations in Kosovo. Hamida, the country director at the time, told us, "Most of the women have been so traumatized that the first month or so, we don't do anything in the way of programming. No, we just cry."

I thought that when I started this blog that I would talk about the social politics of ageing, caregiving, disability and social inclusion. But I find that it's important to talk about stories of kindness first. This is our way of 'crying' together. So - my friend Hiromi is a Japanese American living in London. This is her story of extraordinary kindness.

This was when Hana was a baby in a stroller. We lived in Brooklyn and I did not as yet know how to drive. Friends of ours had given us their hand me down car and I had to go register it at the DMV in Brooklyn. Now I don't know what it's like in Canada, but the DMV in the States is notorious for having surly officious bureaucrats. So off I went with a slightly coldy Hana in her stroller only to discover that I was missing Dan's signature on one of the forms. So I had to go into the city, track down Dan and get his signature. Back at the DMV, I waited in line to discover that somehow I didn't have my checkbook and they didn't take credit cards. So I was leaving again and coming back another day because it was getting close to closing by this point. Then, the guy in line behind me stepped in and asked how much I was short. I can't remember the exact amount,but I think it was over $100. He told me he would lend it to me and I just had to come back and leave the money with the woman at the window. I was just flabbergasted and told him I couldn't. He said not to worry, he's here everyday and I could just pay him back later. It turns out he worked for a used car business and it was his job to register all the cars that got sold everyday. So I gratefully accepted and went home with the car registered. I went back the next day with the money in an envelope to the woman at the window who had helped me the day before. Of course being Japanese, I had two little boxes of chocolate to go with the money, one for him and one for her. She tried to refuse saying she wasn't allowed to accept anything. I told her it was just a little box and it was to say thank you and she relented. Then she told me that he does this all the time but I was the first one ever to come back to return the money. Can you imagine? How can you take someone's incredibly kind gesture and turn it into a handout? Anyway, I still remember that very nice man from time to time and am so grateful for his very generous act.

Sometimes, the kindness of strangers can never be forgotten.